A Little Hiccup in the Road

We finally made it to Germany. I can’t believe November 12 was one month already. We had a temporary apartment for the first 30 days while we looked, and looked, and looked some more for a rental home.

We finally found one and we moved into it on November 10. The day before my hubby came home from work sick to his stomach. We thought he had food poisoning. He kept complaining of the side of his stomach hurting. After spending a night in our new rental home freezing because the floor heat and radiators weren’t working my hubby went to the urgent care on the Army base. I didn’t go because he thought he’d be home that night. He ended up texting me telling me he was going to be hospitalized for a blocked intestine!! WHAT?!! He had the rental car. How was I supposed to go there? WHY didn’t I go WITH him??!! All of these things were going through my mind.

Luckily his immediate boss and wife helped me out. The wife came to get me to bring me to the hospital to get the keys to the car. I confessed I hadn’t yet driven the rental car; I had driven our landlord of the apartment car that was an automatic. She kept going in these roundabout ways to get to the Army base. My anxiety started to spike and I wondered out loud can I drive home without getting lost, and drive the stick shift?!! We ended up at her house to pick up her husband so he could drive the car back to my house. We all (FINALLY) got to the hospital to see my hubby. He confessed the doctor told him it might be stomach cancer. Trying to not show my anxiety I put on my brave face. I don’t want to bore you with the details but if the medical plan wasn’t going to work they would have to do surgery.

Here’s the thing with anxiety. It likes to LIE to you about everything!! You can listen to it or you can say no I am going to look on the positive side and everything will just have to work out. I didn’t want to believe we had our dream come true to move to Germany, and then have something bad happen to my husband. A lot of things kept entering my mind while I lay on our air mattress at night!! Our household goods still aren’t here so we are “camping” out.

Things that helped me out:

  • TAPPING (EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE): In the Tapping Solution APP I tapped on releasing anxiety and release overwhelm.

MEDITATION: On bringing in Light and love, and Appreciation. After my appreciation meditation, I wrote in my journal all of the things I appreciated and was grateful for.

This helps me to calm my anxiety down and keep my mind positive instead of dragging me into a dark hole. I have been there before, I don’t like being there. I know to take care of myself mentally and physically as well. It’s been a lot of trial and error, but I now know what I need to do to keep staying positive. It’s just like exercising every day. We need to work on being mindful. It’s easy to think of all the bad things that could go *wrong*. But I don’t want to dwell on that. Why should I? It will just add more stress and anxiety. And luckily none of those things came true. So I would have just worried for nothing.

If you ever go through something stressful please be gentle with yourself. It takes time to change your thinking to be mindful. It takes practice. I recommend doing 1 meditation or Tapping exercise and repeating it as necessary. Try to stay in the moment as well. Try not to dwell on the future. If you do gently bring yourself back to the now, and here.

What are some of the things you do to stay positive?

Here are 2 good Apps to have in your collection.

  1. Tapping Solution: This has really good subjects to TAP on. You can pick the category that you need for that day.
  2. Gabby Bernstein: this newly redesigned App has meditations, lectures, and a journal.

Embracing Changes

How well are you at changes? Do you make plans and then something happens and you can’t do that plan anymore? Do you get angry? Sad? Frustrated? Do you go completely blank and can’t function? Or do you blame the other person or party?

it’s easy to focus on your plans and want them to go exactly as you envision it. Planning, daydreaming, calling, and making appointments is stressful but how we HANDLE it internally is essential. Raging at someone is not going to help. It won’t help when we need a solution fast. We need to focus and stay in the moment. Focus on what needs to be done here and now. Who can help us? What is an alternative solution?

We’re in the middle of moving to Germany for my husband’s job. Being a military wife I thought I was prepared. I found out I wasn’t. My anxiety went from a 10 to a 100! I lost focus. I couldn’t get it together. This is not normal for me. I’m an organizer. I couldn’t get organized. The cats didn’t have their health certificates for travel. As a result, my husband and I had to travel separately to Germany.

The day the movers came, an hour earlier than they said, we were running around throwing things we didn’t want them to pack in the bathroom. It was chaos.

Many appointments I made got canceled. The appointment for the car to get washed before being transported on a ship to Germany got canceled. The sleep number bed employees didn’t show up to dismantle the bed that we paid them for. We had to watch a you tube video on how to do it. Our 2 neighbors had a laugh at this one.

One of the packers dismantled our internet and packed the modem that has to stay with the house.

I had to pivot and readjust. I could have gotten angry but it would not have helped. I wouldn’t have received the help with customer service. I find that people do not respond well to anger, and don’t want to help out for instance.

I have a friend back in FL whenever I text her about something happening she would text back to remind me the Universe knows what it is doing. Or she would text me and say Just sit and pray on it. An answer will show up. Of course, she was right. Things did turn out but my anxiety kept me believing that it wouldn’t. When I turned my thinking around to being positive I saw that things did turn out the way I had planned them.

I have a spiritual tool bag that I dig into when things seem to be going wrong, or right as the Universe has been showing me. In my bag are as follows:

Get quiet go within and Breathe. This helps signal to the brain to calm the system down when you are feeling stressed.

Tapping on anxiety (Emotional Freedom Technique)

Saying Mantra such as “Peace Begins With ME” for each word tap your thumb and first finger-Peace Tap your 2nd finger and thumb-Begins Tap your ring finger and thumb-With and Tap your pinky finger and thumb-Me

Meditation: I meditate on bringing Peace and Light into my body. I also surrender to the Universe. I can’t make changes if I am stressed and trying to make things happen if it doesn’t align with the Universe. It’s like pushing a brick wall to move. I listen to Gabby Bernstein’s meditations.

What’s gone will be replaced with something better. Embrace every new opportunity as a chance to create change. Trust your intuition as it guides you toward your desired outcome. Be confident in your ability to forge a new path. You have the power to achieve anything you set your mind to. Continue to strive for greatness!

GOT ANXIETY?

Is your anxiety wrecking your life? How do you calm the anxiety down so you can listen to yourself think? Get through a project without being anxious. Do you stay awake all night long thinking about the next day and going through scenarios that something bad is going to happen?   

I was anxious so back that it would turn into full panic attacks. The Pain in my chest hurt so bad, and every time I wondered if I was having a heart attack even though I was in my 30’s. I couldn’t think, I had to tell myself to breathe deep and slow. I had to tell myself that I am safe, there is no danger around me. Sometimes it got so bad that if I was home, I would have to take medicine and lay down. But the problem with that is the medicine made me sleepy so I’d fall asleep. I had 3 kids at home, one being a special need and needed to be watched so he wouldn’t get into things he wasn’t supposed to.

a person holding a cup of coffee

I watched videos, you tube and listened to podcasts on how to meditate and do breathing exercises to calm my nerves. It has helped immensely. Doing EFT (tapping) has been so helpful as well. Positive affirmations work well for me also.  These tools also helped me while I was grieving after our son had passed away.    https://michelleedwardslifecoach.com/she-builds-people-up-because-she-knows-what-it-is-like-to-be-torn-down/

Now I help clients to manage anxiety, I give homework to find the source (or sources) of why you have anxiety, and work through the situation, and then I give them the tools to go through the steps on their own when they are alone.  

If you want to find out why you keep having anxiety, and/or a monkey mind that won’t shut off, I have appointments available to help you.  

Send me an email and we can discuss your options!!  

Live your life the way you have always dreamed of living it!! Take back Control of your life, and find those dreams and make them happen!!!  

How to describe Chronic Illness using Spoon Theory

Spoon Theory? Have you ever heard of it?

I hadn’t until my 20 something daughter texts me to say she was going to take a nap so she can conserve her spoons.

My son and I both replied “spoons? lol”

Later she texts back to tell us to look up Spoon Theory. If you have a chronic illness, auto-immune illness, autism, anxiety, depression, chronic fatigue syndrome, and MORE understanding the spoon theory can help others understand your illness and the effect it can have on your life that others take for granted. For instance, not able to make it through the day with the energy that you have, something people that don’t have a chronic illness rarely have a problem with. They have an abundance of energy and don’t think about conserving their energy to get things done throughout the day.

The person that came up with this theory has Lupus. Her friend wanted to know even though she had been to doctors appts. and drove her around for errands. She was shocked that her friend didn’t understand how she felt every day. They were at a restaurant and she just grabbed spoons and gave them to her. She said now let’s talk about your day. She started to take her spoons away after each activity. Her friend was disappointed. Her friend wanted to keep the spoons but she said NO! I didn’t have a choice with my health and now you don’t have a choice with your spoons!

If you want to read about it more you can read it here

Let’s say you have a thyroid condition with depression and anxiety (like me). You are given 12 spoons a day to spend on each activity that you do throughout your day.

You wake up and get out of bed could cost you 1 spoon.

Taking a shower: washing your body and hair, putting on lotion after the shower, AND getting dressed could cost you 2-3 spoons. I usually skip blow drying my hair and makeup. It will take away more spoons.

Now you are down to 10 spoons. Next is eating breakfast and taking your medicine.

That’s another 2 spoons.

My cat needs to be played with as well. And fed. I have to take him outside as well. He visits his (our) neighbors. I follow him around the back yards. I’m hoping everyone has their curtains closed and not see us so I don’t have to talk to them. That takes energy from me as well. Not that I don’t love talking to my neighbors, it’s just on certain days that I didn’t sleep well it’s tiring to stand there and talk. That could cost me 3 spoons!

Now I am down to 5 spoons and it’s not even noon yet! This is when you start planning your day out for the rest of the 5 spoons. Do I have a frozen meal for dinner that I can put in the oven before my hubby gets home from work? What about laundry? Folding and putting the laundry away. What other chores that I have to do or can I put off for the next day?

Now you are down to 8 spoons. Luckily for me, I work from my home office and I can sit and meditate and gain back some energy. In the article, her friend gets down to her last spoon. They discuss making dinner and crashing, or order take out which you don’t have the energy to drive to go get it? Her friend says to make soup and call it a day. She is then left with zero spoons. None. Zilch.

Some days may be better than other days. It also depends if you sleep well the night before. Some days if you want to clean the house you may have to “borrow” spoons from tomorrow. You may know that tomorrow you will be wiped out if you clean the house. Taking care of yourself, and your spoons are essential. Figuring out how much energy you have for a day can help you have a better and productive day. It can help you visually to know what tasks will take more energy. It can help you plan your day out. If you have a doctor’s appt that day, you know that you won’t have enough spoons to do laundry and cleaning that day. It may help reduce the anxiety in your life, or It could help you to tell your significant other that “hey, tomorrow is a really busy day, and I know I will not be up to making dinner, can you help me out?” It may reduce arguments as well if you can plan your day out in advance.

I am proud of my daughter!! She realizes that taking care of yourself is a priority if you want to have a good day. This exercise may help you with anxiety, frustration, anger, or any other feeling you or somebody in your life may have. It can help visually explain to others how you are feeling and why you don’t have energy throughout the day.

Do you think this could help you in your life? Would it bring the stress level down knowing you won’t have to do everything in a day? Let me know in the comments. I would love to hear if it can help you.

What does a life coach do?

As a life coach, I help you dream big and stretch your horizons to create a compelling vision for your life.

I help you chart the course to get there. As a life coach, I hold you accountable to yourself by holding you to a higher expectation and standards and reminding you of why you’re doing it all.

I challenge you to see your true potential and to settle for nothing less than what you are meant to be.

I help you find meaning even in the challenges in your life and gives your pain a  purpose.

I help you keep your monkey mind in check so that you can choose optimism and feel confident and master a mindset of success.

I can be the expert or the guide that shows you a shortcut to your success whether it’s in your career or business, a relationship, or any other part of your life.

I have proven strategies for finding your dream job or from escaping the rat race or overcoming yourself with sabotaging beliefs.

I can help develop confidence or increase your motivation or make life changes. I work with the client to brainstorm the desired goals and outcomes and create actionable plans for achievement.

A coach’s role is to provide clients with questions, observations, feedback, encouragement, support, and accountability to assist their clients in meeting their goals.

How? By learning Mindfulness with meditation and positive affirmations, Staying in the Present Moment, Help with Anxiety, How to get unstuck, and learn how to move forward. I can help slow down the Monkey-Mind, Learn to regulate your self-talk. Change the beliefs that are holding you back.

WHY: Somewhere along the line you were told something about yourself, and you are still believing it. You have been wearing many hats, and you have lost your true self. You long for Peace,  You long for Vitality, You want to believe in YOURSELF again.  Your SOUL is Hurting.

Who can I help?

You’ve lost a loved one. You’ve lost a job (or several). You, or your spouse is, or was in the military. You have anxiety. You want to move on in your life.

As a Certified Professional Life Coach and a Certified Mindfulness Coach, I have helped clients become aware of their self-talk, Overcoming being on autopilot, and to move on. I can help with Overcoming indecisions. Overcome inaction. And so much more by helping you with meditations, positive affirmations, and a 12 step by step process to finding your passion and your purpose.

I found my life purpose, let me help you find yours.